David Bowie

A brief note about the content for this piece of writing: I discuss a sexual assault of a minor.

Growing up, images of the strangeness a human being could imagine for themselves was essentially unknown to me. I tended towards weird fiction from an early age, loving stories with protagonists who didn’t fit the norms imposed upon them from outside. Once I was allowed to buy my own music (after a period of exploring the popular options of the 90s), I gravitated towards the artists who had ‘weirdness’ and ‘outsider’ emblazoned across their bodies in neon and black glitter—Nirvana, Queen, Marilyn Manson, Tool, NIN. The Cure, Bjork, Radiohead, The Smashing Pumpkins. David Bowie.

A couple of things stand out from the music I listened to when I was younger: Those bands and artists are primarily white and primarily male. I’ve made strides to correct this in recent years. That isn’t what I want to talk about right now, however. (And probably not something I’d write about to a general audience; I’m white, and don’t have any original or important insights into racism. I’ll leave that to better and more important writers.)

What might not be so obvious upon first glance is that amongst their number lie men who have done evil things. Bad, morally reprehensible things. Often, these things were done to women. These men were products of their culture, thoroughly, regardless of how Other and Weird and Queer (not necessarily a reference to their sexuality) they may have seemed to Young Me.

Recently, one of these artists has died. He was one of the artists who did morally reprehensible and morally questionable things, from the racism present in his body of work to the advantage he took of a young girl who put her trust in him. By “took advantage of”, I don’t mean that he made her do unpleasant chores for him, or that he took money for her. It’s a very mild euphemism for statutory rape. In her own words, David Bowie “took [her] virginity” when she was barely into her teens. Her name is Lori Maddox.

You can imagine that my feelings when I heard of Bowie’s death were perhaps on the strong side. Statutory rape is undeniably a capital-B Bad Thing, given the power dynamic at play between a young girl and an older man. The young girl in question, when she was older and an adult woman, doesn’t claim to have been harmed by Bowie’s actions. That’s good for her; not all of us are able to claim no harm in these situations.

Regardless of the lack of harm done to Maddox, Bowie’s actions were not consistent with morality as I understand it. “With great power comes great responsibility.” Yes, I’m quoting a comic book character in reference to morality. It’s an important idea, though. Bowie was clearly the one with all of the power--he had the glam, the money, the drugs, the fame. He was older than Maddox. He had the power in the situation; he did not handle it with any sort of responsibility.

I was never that into Bowie. I enjoyed his music. I enjoyed his movies. I enjoyed his weirdness, and I enjoyed seeing his image when I happened upon it. I didn’t go out of my way to find his music, though I know I had meant to at some point. I perhaps wasn’t what you’d call a fan. But his art touched my life. His weirdness let me know that there was a space for me. His art told me that being queer and strange wasn’t a hindrance to my art, that it was a boon.

Was David Bowie a good man? That’s not really the question. Is there such a thing as ‘good people’? I don’t believe there are. There are good actions, actions which are moral, which follow from ethical principles. There are bad (evil, even) actions, actions which may be performed with moral intent but which result in bad ends, which follow from flawed ethical principles.

There can be grey areas when trying to determine what ‘good’ and ‘bad’ are. That’s okay, I think. We’re all just trying to figure out how to be good people, as impossible as that goal may be.

David Bowie did terrible things. David Bowie had a positive influence on my life, and many other lives. These aren’t contradictory ideas. I likely won’t ever be able to listen to my Best of Bowie 2-CD set without remembering that Bowie slept with a barely-teenager. My feelings when I learned of David Bowie’s were quite strong. They were also incredibly complicated.

Was David Bowie a good man? No. Does his goodness matter? I don’t know.