Sexist Language & Communication, Pt 2

In his response to the quote from our text, [Student] puts forward the idea that the use of sexist or sexually objectifying language is down to immaturity and lack of guidance as a young person. I agree that immaturity and lack of appropriate role models is a contributing factor to some of this sexism, but I don’t think they’re the only or even the most common factors. Laying the blame for these types of behaviors on immaturity implies that a person will eventually grow out of these behaviors. Unfortunately, sexually objectifying and sexist comments come out of the mouths of more mature people as easily as they come out of immature people.

In my mind, the problem with sexually objectifying language isn’t so much that the person who is being sexually objectified is doing anything wrong (whether they’re fully-clothed or bare naked), but that the person who is directly the sexually objectifying language at them is attempting to force their morality on another person. Calling a woman a “bitch” or “slut” is a way to police her actions; being insulted is a negative experience, and one that you don’t want to happen to you again. I think instead of just telling young people that you shouldn’t call women or men these terms, you get them to think about why they’re passing judgement on others, and why they’re trying to police the actions of others.

I also think there’s too much emphasis in conversations about how men talk about women on how sexual men are. Being a sexual being doesn’t mean that you lose all respect for the target of your attraction. Additionally, I think if we hold to the idea that young men are somehow unable to control or learn to deal with their sexual urges, we’re doing a huge disservice to young men twofold--one, young men are expected to be supersexual beings, and those who don’t feel they meet these expectations are surely going to suffer psychologically; and two, it can become an apologetic for sexual assault: not just for young men assaulting women, but also young men being assaulted. If men are these hypersexual people, they’re expected to say yes to every opportunity that crosses their path; young men may feel pressured to engage in sexual activities they otherwise wouldn’t care to participate in. Young men need to be able to say no to sex just as much as women, and constantly bringing up that young men are supposedly hypersexed puts pressure on young men to say yes when they don’t want to.